My wise friend once said "Men are the cause of a woman's insanity."

Okay I'm not insane let's not get ahead of ourselves but I am seriously starting to believe that men are the cause of any confusion in a woman's life. Seriously...what the hell is going on?

I'm not going to lie, I used to be one of those girls - erratic, neurotic, always overthinking everything and complicating the simplest of relationships. Obviously I still check my phone when I like someone and question things sometimes when it seems strangely suspicious but what normal girl doesn't. I just would really enjoy a simple life, where people didn't drop bombshells a year too late, where the nice guys didn't act so nice that it somehow made them seem inauthentic and pressed you to ask - what are they hiding? Where people were just upfront and if they liked you just put it out there. Where nothing was complicated by space and time. I am asking too much I know it would just be nice sometimes...I'm just asking for a simple life. Cheers.

So...I cancelled my date tonight with Mr nice guy because I am a crazy person. Or maybe not I don't know. I have always learnt to go with my gut instict and this time it didn't feel right. I wasn't excited about going like I was when we first met, in fact part of me almost felt some sort of dread which is a terrible thing to say because he actually hasn't done anything wrong. To put it frankly, he's flaky and I only like flakes in my cereal. Anything I think is going to get weird or complex and my brain immediately says "Let's make like lightning and bolt!"

On the plus side K is here this weekend, my first proper visitor and I really can't wait to see her. I haven't seen her since my leaving do in august so it has been far too long. I also feel very privileged to have Canadian au pair here, she actually keeps me sane in situations like these. Big up to ma homie Atlanta chillin' in her mini crib. I'm peacing out rightta bout now.

Mange, prie, aime

Thanks to my wonderful friend Canadian aupair I am finally beginning to read 'Eat, pray, love' by Elizabeth Gilbert. Most people out there who enjoy reading should have heard of it as it is now a worldwide best seller. It has been recommended to me with the promise that it will make me more 'zenful' - I hope so I could use some positive zen at the moment and yoga doesn't work for me. Tying my body in a knot to cause relaxation somehow doesn't appeal. I will maybe blog a review after I have finished it...I have been thinking about starting a review page for a while now a) to keep track of how many books I read (because it's frustrating forgetting) and b) so other people can see what is really worth reading. It's just finding the time and again, much more writing.

Today however, minus the blog, I am writing seulement en français. I couldn't have more work to do if I had got down on my knees and physically begged for les devoirs. Merci beaucoup Sebastian et Sylvie. I also have a test on the french verbs in the present, infitive and past tense. If you have never taken French I should inform you that this is a hell of a lot of verbs and I have to learn them all and those forms for a test tomorrow. Oh joy. It's a good job I enjoy learning French!

On another note the electrician is coming again to fix my shutter so I will finally be able to see outside! I have missed the natural light coming into my room and also not being able to use my entrance to sneak out at night and steal croissants while the bakers are sleeping.

France vs England football match tonight, should be interesting as we aren't playing well at the moment but to be fair France never really play well...but this new team is looking like a positive move. We shall see...I predict a 1-1 draw. Was thinking of going to watch it in a bar but host dad is putting it on the TV upstairs which means I can watch it on my hugeee TV downstairs so I think I will opt for that, only thing I will miss out on is a jug of beer and some english hooligans. I think I can cope with missing that...

Rememberance

Today is Rememberance day so before I enjoy my day off I have to remember why this day is a public holiday. Interestingly enough I actually have a great great probably great again Grandfather buried in a French cemetry here. I hae visited his grave before and if it wasn't so far I would be visiting it again. Luckily enough for him he didn't return home as one of the 12000 unknown soldiers. But that is what today is all about and the unknown soldiers across the world are used as an example of how important it is to remember the men who gave their lives so we would have the freedom we have today. I will be wearing my poppy today.

On a slightly brighter note I am going shopping avec mes amis aujourd'hui because I have lots of dollar thanks to my babysitting day yesterday. I may buy a Longchamp bag...know I shouldn't but just might, I am in love with them. Or...a new dress for Samedi soir. However it is actually raining so badly it looks like we might be paddling to Paris on an inflatable lilo...that raincoat my mum told me I didn't need suddenly seems so much more IMPORTANT now, damn it.

Due date ce soir!!!!!!!!!! Finalement.

Oh hello winter, time for a snow cone

Okay so it's not actually snowing, nor do I even really know what a snow cone is as I'm pretty sure they are only available in America but you get the idea. It's cold and it's wet and it's more cold and it's more wet. Oh and there are piles of leaves everywhere that are literally the size of small islands, it's so bizarre I have never seen this many leaves in one place. I have a serious urge to dive into them everytime I walk past them, which is about 50 times a day so you can see the temptation taunting me. Must surpass the urge, must not jump into leaves like 5 year old out-of-control child.

Just to pre-warn you if you haven't noticed today's blog is all about a bit of rambling. I ramble when I am jittery and have things on my mind which is probably the cause of this rambly blog but to heck with it. Tonight Maple leaf au pair described me as "Like the rebel child trying to beat suburbia in a modern day Jane Austen." I actually love her way with words, she is a literary genius, I often read her blog and always finish up smiling or laughing. It is a talent I don't really have and envy that she possesses...Anyway I won't go into the mess I have got myself into, or might have got myself into I don't even know. Ramble over.

This week the French are having another holiday, not that I'm complaining I'm actually loving life. I get Wednesday's off anyway, I had a half day today and I get Thursday, Friday off for some random public holiday. Un jour férié the French call it - whatever it means I get a day off :) I am debating doing some xmas shopping as I have actually been saving money, never thought you would see the day well here it is - I am saving and not spending. Dad don't freak out. Or peut-être je vais visiter le Chateau de Versailles avec mes amis, je ne sais pas :)

Also realising more and more the barriers of language, even with Maple leaf when we supposedly speak the 'same' language I say words she doesn't understand and vice versa. I just said I fancied a Magnum...as in the ice cream. Magnum as I have just been informed is a type of American condom, hence the confusion. Mon dieu what wrong signals that could give off...Or she thought I meant a type of kebab, either way we weren't on the same page ha.

Weather - improve or I will be cross. On the plus side Christmas is getting crazily close and I have lots of British visitors before then :)

Bleugh.

Not going to lie, I feel like crap. I have caught a rotten cold which is both taking away my appetite and energy. Plus I have run out of paracetamol so I am taking the hard road and just dealing. Hope it isn't flu...boooo. On the plus side it is helping to kick off my Charlotte Church 'halve your meal sizes and become super thin diet'. Oh what I would do to be naturally tiny. Damn the curvacious women of my ancestory.

On the plus side I am going to see the Catacombs tomorrow with Sophie, something I have been wanting to see and do for ages. Loads of dead people buried underground...my cup of tea. Ha just kidding...well not really but if you are interested -

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Catacombs_of_Paris

then swot up bloggers! But really...it is a huge underground cemetry in Paris, ever thought about how there's no green areas in Paris...where do you think they used to put their dead? You guessed it, right under your Louis Vuitton, Christian Louboutin, Jimmy Choo, stupidly expensive shoes.

Historically though...seriously interesting. Will blog after as I just sneezed on the screen, EUGH screw you sickness.